Minggu, 18 Maret 2012

I'm not strong enough

I'm 17th years old.
Supposed to be mature.
Insya allah I'm gonna graduate from High School.
My responsibility is going bigger.
The pressure doesn't stop.

But please, I'm not strong enough.
I'm still labil.
I'm still teenager.
I still need someone, who I can rely on.
I'm still childish, sometimes I can't hold my tears any longer.
I still need someone, who can hug me warmly...

If there's nobody can with me anymore, why am I still alive?

Please, if I ever made a mistake, please tell me!
I can't take the silent treatment!
Sometimes, I imagine myself suicide.
My hands full of blood, my vains are ripped, I'm holding a knife, scissor, or a piece of sharp glass.
Because sometimes, it just feel better when you're not alive if you treated like this!

I screamed, I cried, but nobody there!
I want to cried, I expected you to hug me, but you never calmed me!
You forbid me to cry, you mock me when I get weaker, you gets angry when I can't be like your expected!!
But please, I can't acted that I'm strong everyday!




If you don't need me anymore....
It will be my pleasure to leave.

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